ImageOk, so I’ve got two veggie friendly no retinyl palmitate and whole food nutrition and i’m pretty excited to try them. I decided I might as well do a side by side comparison and taste test.

1)Nature’s Plus’s ‘wafers’ are GIANT. La Croix for scale (which is delicious btw i’m totally hooked)

2) They don’t taste that great, very grassy. Which wouldn’t be awful if they were smaller but as you can see– HUGE. I’m supposed to eat two of those at once?

3) Pioneer tastes much better and is a manageable size and much lower sugar

4) I’m jittery. I only had one of each for testing and that was…6 hours ago. I’m wired! Crazy pants. We’ll find out tomorrow which one did it as I’ll be starting off with the Pioneer because of taste.

So let’s have a look at those profiles!

Pioneer’s profile!


Nature’s Plus Source of Life

I think they’re both pretty awesome and I’m excited to make the switch but seriously, Nature’s Plus is so huge.

I’m also trying out a Cal/Mag/Zinc formula  which has been working pretty well for me. Again it’s a bit high in sugar and calories but it’s worth it to not be sick to my stomach as pill form vitamins make me. In fact after having the multi’s I haven’t had even a hint of nausea. I’m excited!

Also I get all my vitamins and such from Vitacost!Not only is their referral program good for both of us, you’ll also find a lot of things you probably already use for a lot less than Whole Foods or HEB or other grocery and health stores. Also their generic brands are SUPER cheap, it’s almost embarrassing, but still nice quality.

Ok! Off to bed (which feels weird because my place is 90% packed but my bed is still made hahah) Night loves!


This is me procrastinating packing

I’m moving in a few days and it hasn’t sunk in how imminent it is yet. I’m being bad about packing and all that but I’ve sorted almost all the other things that go along with moving with the exception of those things that are pesky like address changes on all accounts across the board. For me that’s a lot of things! The good thing is I’m learning my new address quickly!


On the health front–I’m doing pretty poorly as far as diet is concerned. There’s a lot of poor reporting on my part and a lot of bad choices too.

I’m also not working out this week or last because of the move and the tedium of packing. The good news is though– I don’t have RA!

I do, however, again have a thyroid dis-regulation. It’s our favorite phrase everyone!! Say it with me:


but unspecific.


sigh. Luckily most of my other labs are in normal range, but my poor diet choices lately definitely show. My cholesterol was higher than normal as was my (non fasting but still) blood sugar. No bueno!

But today has been (almost) good.

Oatmeal, apple sauce, whole foods lunch with tomato soup, a bit of rice, and carrots and then a nice baked potato this evening.

…and two oreos. I did say almost.

…and a fruit snack.

Yeah, almost.

Anyway, I can’t wait to be settled down and unpacking and back playing with my kinect! I love that thing! I also can’t wait to be out of my flooded apartment.

This weekend it rained quite a bit here in Austin and despite having several towels packed up against the door, my whole floor  is sodden near the door. Fantastic.

Just a few more days, few more days.  Then i’ll celebrate with some juice!

Well, things have taken a turn

I was so excited. So very excited to have everything on the right path.

I come home Wednesday after a triumphant trip to whole foods (where everything is delicious and joyus) to find that someone had made a valiant attempt to break into my apartment.


They didn’t get in, and after a police report, a fight with my apartment complex, and the support of wonderful friends and neighbors I’ve got a new reinforced set of locks/deadbolt/plates and screws so long the guy warned me that the fire department would have a HELL of a time getting in, so don’t go burning the place down.

I said I’d do my best.

It’s been stressful, even though they didn’t succeed and ALL of my valuables and sensitive papers have been moved to a secure undisclosed location, it is still a violation of my privacy and has lead me to not be scared but to be angry, more angry than a swarm of Chinese hornets. I’m Texan and just because I don’t believe in cruelty to animals doesn’t mean I extend that same nonviolence to people. In fact, quite the opposite. What I’m most angry about is not the thought that they could have taken something of mine, or tried to attack me, but that might have impacted my cats.

And you are out of your G-d mind if you think I’d let that aggression stand.

I realized in the hours following I was capable of some sadistic acts, I relished in the thought that if I got my hands on someone I would make them beg for their mother before handing them to the police.

Restoring balance to the universe.

You have no idea how many times it played in my head.

I’d like to thank the Austin PD or being amazing and not writing off my concerns but being  open and honest and caring. They didn’t even bat an eyelash when I said, what i’m sure sounded very strange, that i was sitting in my apartment locked in, holding a hammer.

The dispatch officer just calmly said: good, that’s good, we’ll be there in just a minute.

I was, by the way, sitting on my wicker couch, next to my cats, twirling my hammer and thinking about what the hook end could do to a burglar’s eyeballs. Like I said, I was angry.


Doctors and dentists!

Thursday I had a nice dentist appointment for my routine cleaning and  checkup. It’s nice to have a clean bill of dental health. I haven’t always. In fact I’ve had the worst luck ever but all my amalgams are out and I’ve now just got a pretty set of porcelain and natural chompers that are enjoying the feeling after a cleaning. I cannot stress to people enough how awesome good dental health is. TAKE CARE OF YOUR TEETH PEOPLE.

Friday, however, was my rheumatology check up and another round of blood draws. 7 vials. Let’s see what they show when they show.

However, we discussed my meds as they stand now and what is working and what is not. Basically not much in the way of medication is working. My ultram takes the edge off enough on my bad days for me to function but we’re both agreed the changes need to come from other regimens. I have been prescribed massage hahaha, which I mean he knows I already have a therapist and i LOVE her! But he’s told me I am to do them without excuse, i have the doctor’s permission to treat myself. He’s happy about my blood pressure which was 120/80 in the office, which is text book and fabulous! And really surprising considering that the previous two nights I had ZERO sleep. Even with people staying at my place and even sleeping somewhere else while I had a big burly Australian checking on my cats, I couldn’t sleep. I was really really mad.

I was so mad I actually caved a bit and had tacos from Taco C. HUGE mistake, my body regretted it almost immediately. I’m still a bit nauseated. I forsee watermelon for dinner, clean and refreshing.

Meanwhile– I’m in the market for a new gummy vitamin. Why gummy? pill vitamins make me vomit. I don’t know why but they always have. Gummy or chewable or what have you, i’m looking for one that is vegan and I mean actually vegan. I’d really like one that uses a carotene not palmitate for Vitamin A for starters.

I like having a multi despite having many whole foods with a wide range of nutrients and even things like my Nanogreens which has a great nutrient profile because it makes sure that there are no gaps daily. If I have excess of something that’s ok, my body will eliminate it, but on those days when I could use the boost, it’s there to help me along (we all have days when it’s just like…ugh, oreos, oreos are good).

My current gummy, however, is retinyl palmitate for Vitamin A, which can cause toxicity and is something I’d just like to avoid. You know the worst side effect of beta carotene? you turn orange. Whateve, I can deal with that a lot better than liver failure. Learn a bit more about Vitamin A here!

oh and here!

in fact, i would be totally ok with a daily multi that had NO vitamin A at all. I simply don’t need it in supplemental form and it’s one of the few vitamins that can actually cause issues without trying to OD on it. ( too much of anything is bad but you have to REALLY work at it–like intravenous use– to cause toxicity with most vitamins).


So if anyone has some suggestions I’m totally open to them!


And I’m back

The last few months have been inexcusable. I’ve been busy, stressed, and utterly horrible to myself and so, I’m back because I can’t take it anymore. I let allllllll of that be an excuse to back slide into nasty habits that have only aggravated my pain and illness and thus perpetuated the cycle. I’ve tried to get back on the wagon without blogging but honestly, I’ve not done well without it.

Writing about this journey has helped me, so I’m going to keep writing about it.

My last post was in Feb. I should bring y’all up to speed!


I won my company’s weight loss challenge! Not just won, I KILLED IT.

That means that I won a trip to San Francisco but I traded that with my second place buddy (who did AMAZING and won the fitness challenge outright) for a $750 gift card to

Which was fabulous!


During this time I also was searching for a house. This was the start of my undoing. It is immensely time consuming and stressful and in this market I was actually making offers on houses without seeing them because if you didn’t, you’d miss your chance completely. Even so, I won no bids but four and of those they all failed inspections miserably. It was expensive, painful, and quite frankly made me hate my life.

I gave up. Instead in November I’m moving into an AMAZING new apartment  that is going to be a little more expensive, a little farther out, but it is: huge, next door to my wonderful friend Sarah, has amazing amenities, and is in a safe and lovely part of town.


I also got myself a new bed because the bed I had since high school was just not doing well for my back. It is fabulous!

During this time I also began to suffer a lot of pain because I made poor choice, stopped working out, was sleeping poorly, and was doing all the things that I shouldn’t be doing that was hurting my fragile health.

So I began taking steps to breaking the cycle, like the new bed!

I got into physical therapy as it turns out one of my biggest back problems is a nice fat pinched nerve and hyper-mobile L3 and L4. At some point I re-injured my back and that cascaded. It’s improving immensely now!

I’ve got a reliable rheumatologist and he’s immensely helpful and very open to non-drug intervention. He’s supportive of holistic diet approaches, acupressure, massage, and other therapies to manage my pain and my deterioration and hopefully reverse it.

I got myself a kinect! and I loooooooooooove it! It’s so fun and helps me out with my yoga as it can help me correct postures. I also got the whole things for 99$, i think i profited from a broken relationship. I should feel bad about that but having been in the same position all i can think is haha you go girl. I’m so mean!

My juicer died. i might have had a hand in that, so I got myself a high powered personal blender. I take it as a sign that I need to switch to smoothies!

Anyway! It’s all about getting back on track– Healthy, whole foods, plant based deliciousness! I’ve been working on it but it’s time to hold myself accountable and use this as a way to help my mental and emotional health. I don’t like talking to people about it, i much prefer writing about it.

You’ll notice typos and such too and that happens. I’m not writing this for professional reasons, it’s a stream of consciousness. No revision, no sugar coating, no holding back. Occasionally I’ll post something more polished, but you’ll be able to tell those. Recipes and whatnot 🙂 buuuuuuuuuuut for the most part– prepare thyself for typos and silly grammar.

Also i’m now on myfitnesspal– agomez281. Join me!

I’m not here just to lose weight (though i could stand it) but to stop just existing and really get my life back. I felt SO GOOD eating right and so shitty eating poorly. Now that I’ve really seen and felt the difference, I cannot let myself go back to the ‘food like’ toxic products. It’s not worth it, I deserve better.

That’s really what this blog is about, reaffirming publicly and daily that I am worth it. I’m worth the cost, I’m worth the time and effort. I am worthy of being healthy and happy.

Believe it or not that’s a real struggle for me. When nothing in your body works, when you feel so damaged, it’s really hard to justify the investment.

But I have a lot of reasons to invest in myself. I have amazing people in my life, I deserve to be healthy enough to spend time with them.

I have an amazing family who loves me deeply, I have the power to alleviate their worry.

I have AWESOME CATS! They need me to have the energy to play and cuddle and love them.

I’m awesome! I’m funny, I’m caring, I’m smart, I’m even pretty! I deserve to take the best care, to have the best food, to heal my body!

I’m worth it. You’re worth it.

Stewart Smalley people, he knows what’s up!

Weirdly full

I’ve felt full since I woke up. I don’t know why. I’ve eaten despite total lack of hunger because things still taste good.

I might be coming down with something, my head has been throbbing today. I suppose I’ll find out in the morning. That’d be the cherry on the week wouldn’t it? The day I’m supposed to have my first nonraw thing. My one cheat meal in a month. Pancakes. I want you.

But if I do wake up ill I’ve decided that I won’t go into work and I’ll cancel all three of my plans and stay in bed with my juice and tea. 

Regardless, this weekend i’ll post up my last raw measurements and see what up.

I’m looking forward to chicken. Fifth element style


The home stretch

So sorry no post yesterday. I spent the majority of my time at home without power yesterday due to a downed power liner. Awesome, right?

Well no, it made me incredibly grumpy. I therefore spent a good portion of that time being grumpy and shoving clementines in my mouth.

As my friend James rightly pointed out though, at least I didn’t have to worry about cooking anything!

Today was much better though and it ended with a nice sashimi dinner with my friends Amy and Dan. I haven’t gotten to see them in a few years! They’ve both been deployed in Afghanistan and well, that can put a damper on home visits.

AH! I missed them! So now I’m in a fabulous mood of course 🙂

Only a few more days committed to 100% raw. It’s been a good experience overall, I think. It’s been a little more socially isolated  that I’d have liked to be but I have to ask myself if that’s such a bad thing or if maybe I should have made more of an effort to bring others into the experience.

Friday I have a lunch date with my co-workers at Beet’s, and I’m hoping that they like it. A few are skeptical and only one has expressed excitement and he’s the last place I would have expected it from.

Eating healthy, not eating flesh at every meal, and ENJOYING fresh raw vegetables shouldn’t be seen as weird, unlikely or somehow shameful. It shouldn’t feel like you’re doing something wrong because you’re not being ‘normal’ but I’ve encountered that a lot. “oh…it’s vegan?” , “wait, there’s no meat?”, “what do you mean? salad isn’t a meal” etc

I love meat, I love poultry, I love (some) fish. Eggs, cheese, milk! Delicious sure but wow there really is a whole world out there full of flavorful and delicious things that aren’t from animals or tofu for that matter.

Nuts, dear nuts! I’ve never been a big fan before. I don’t know why really. I don’t like them in baked goods and I’ve never really liked trail mixes and all that but I love them in raw recipes. Cashews! I NEVER ate cashews before, but now I see them as incredibly versatile. Same goes for seeds, it’s incredible. Flaxers! Flax seed crackers! Sturdy and delicious and perfect for thick dips.

There is an incredibly flavorful and vibrant world outside of salted processed microwaved crap that we call ‘normal food’ and the best part is? It just happens to be good for you too.

There are def some products and styles I will adopt forever because they taste so much better than the conventional counter parts. Isn’t that crazy? ‘Health food’ that is better than the so called ‘real thing’ (Hail Merry’s tarts, I’m looking at you!).

Madness, I know.

That being said here’s how the next few days are going to go down:

Friday I have lunch set up with co-workers as my last ‘raw meal’ on this experiment and that night I’m getting myself PANCAKES from Kerbey, remember those cinnamon roll pancakes? Awww yeah. But then for the next three days (maybe longer we’ll see) I will be back on the juice before I begin my proper mix of raw and clean.

Clean will hopefully be less expensive lol.

I’ve spent way way way more than i ever planned on this, but my health is worth it 🙂



…and btw Beet’s superfood clusters are insanely addictive and delicious and omg i ate three of them this afternoon all at once. AH so good